Bunsen.tv - Los Angeles writer, Mark Lisanti's personal blog

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Sony Commands You To Start Caring About 'Spider-Man 3'

Late yesterday afternoon, the marketing department at Sony decided that the time had finally come to induce the painful, 14-month buzz erection in the fanboy population that must precede the opening of the next installment of The Greatest Superhero Franchise Of Them All, Spider-Man 3. Superherohype.com has been anointed to kick off the priapic odyssey by displaying the first teaser pic, which will be obsessed over as if it were carved into a stone tablet and flown down from heaven by Moses riding on Superman's shoulders. [Ed.note--You mixed DC and Marvel universes in that last sentence, are you crazy? You'll be dead by the end of this post!] The questions begin: Why does Spidey look so sad? Where's his umbrella? Oooh, has Fat Tobey been working out again, or is that black costume just really slimming?

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If you had to work out as hard as he has for these movies, you'd want some Malomars on your downtime too. Fat or skinny, he's still 10 times the actor Gyllenhaal will ever be.

Are you frickin' crazy??? Don't post ANYTHING detrimental to the fanboy comics community. You can make fun of Tom Cruise, but don't fucking make fun of SPIDER-MAN!!...Geez, have some restraint for Christ's sake!

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